The last week of this diet is supposed to be “Tiger Blood” but honestly I feel -however cleansed, however stronger in odd ways- drained. I think, “I’m hungry” but … I don’t want any more allowed fats, I don’t want any more protein, and I don’t want any more fruit or veg. I want dairy. I was thinking, “I’d eat carrots” until I realized I just wanted the butter I cook the carrots in… Oy.
I’m going to get through but I don’t have to be cheering. Instead, I spent some time flipping through my copy of Nourishing Traditions, which is my “next thing”.
The value of a hard reset like this is that you get your taste buds and your habits rewired. Plus, after a month of extremely restricted eating, taking more time and trouble to get the best food value is less scary. And I *do* feel better.
(Saying that I simultaneously feel better and worse is confusing, for which I apologize, I’ll try again. I’d bogged up with sugar and wheat and eating progressively larger portions of rice and walked away from what I know to be best practice. And my body felt it. I was tired all the time, I was sugar dependent for that energy “bounce”, I was just run-down. So – I don’t feel like that anymore. My energy is constant. My workouts show that my body is running properly. I know I got the gunk out of my system. But. I just can’t get enough calories on this diet. I’ve had two friends shake their heads at me… but I eat a LOT. And since I’ve been hungry (no I don’t want any more eggs!) for a while now, I just feel depleted. I will take July and cherish myself and refeed -very carefully- so as to get past this feeling of being drained without regaining weight. I feel… well, I guess a good analogy is how you feel on antibiotics. You can feel that the infection is gone, but the nausea gets old fast. That’s what I’m saying. I feel cleansed, but … I’m hungry, and being hungry makes me tired – deep tired, not surface tired. If anything, the hunger makes it difficult to rest.)
So, what to do? Well, I had toyed with staying Primal after the time was over, but I think my aim is going to be Nourishing Traditions instead. What does that mean? It means that I’m going to keep my sauce mojo going – my family LOVES sauces, and NT is heavy on sauce. It means that I’m going to embrace ferments. We already love kefir (well, sweetened kefir), yogurt, and sauerkraut. It’s a little warm for much in the way of soup, but I can try a few cold soups – oh, how I can feel my body hungering for good soup. (Actually this reminds me, I think I’m going to drag some chicken broth out of the freezer, I think that will help my hunger).
It also means that I’m going to try some “properly prepared” (aka NT) grains when I’m doing my reintroduction. Am I wheat intolerant, or do I just need it soaked? (I think I am wheat intolerant, but I’m going to try spelt and see where that gets me – I know oats and rye like me).
I want to return to a diet that is truly health-enhancing for my body, a diet that helps me do the things I want to do – there are so very many things I want to do!
I also want to lose weight, and I want to feel good while I do it. If I can find the foods that my body wants, I can give it those foods, and just reduce the amount slightly. I know that crash diets are bad juju.
So, that’s where I’m going next – NT. Have I done it before? Eh. I’ve done a few bits of it before, but *before* I thought halfway was good enough. If there’s one thing I’ve learned… halfway is NOT good enough!!!